I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
