Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
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