Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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