Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
third nipple confirmed
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Randomize
