i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Randomize
