North Korea, Best Korea!
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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