I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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