I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
