Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
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