i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
tell me about the fingering
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