There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Terrible idea I love it
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