Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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