that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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