we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
