and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize
