We won't sleep together?
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
