Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
