I never want to see another naked old woman again.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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