I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
