I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
