I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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