After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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