i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Randomize
