I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Randomize
