Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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