I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
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