My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
