No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
