if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
This house was built for laser tag.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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