I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
