"it" just moved
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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