And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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