I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I had to cum in my sink.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
