Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
