the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Randomize
