I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
A+ Viking dick
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Randomize
