my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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