me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize
