I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize