Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
