just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
