his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
