u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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