yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
