How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I need to calm my uterus...
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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