are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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