Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
