Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
handjob tips. give me some.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
