Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
