Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
